Today I had the pleasure of reading a friend’s latest blog post, his first after quite a long hiatus. http://bit.ly/2Fjreve
And reading Ricco’s post had me pondering my lives – atomic and Second, and how reclusive I am, and always have been.
In the beginning of my Second Life it was primarily due to my PC being less than capable of allowing me to see the wider environment. It simply could not cope.
So I stayed ‘at home’ and built with a vengeance!
Perched on my platform all day I cobbled prims into a Something or Other. And I was very happy to be doing so.
It was the reason I first entered Second Life – to make, and create ……and without all the fuss and mess and bother that usually accompanied my entire life.
No more wood shavings under my feet, no gesso dust in my nostrils – or the constant lingering smells of glue and paint and turpentine.
To have my kitchen used solely for the purpose it was intended for – food! Not as the place I washed and hung my paint brushes and tack cloths to dry.
To grow my nails!
I had found my new workroom in a pixel environment.
True, it did not make me a living as those other things had done, but it served to fulfill my need to create. Something. Anything.
And now, even though I have a machine with more than enough capability to explore – I’m still perched in the sky on a platform!
Nowadays I don’t build quite so much, but I spend hours creating backdrops, and digging through my inventory for just the right piece of clothing or hair to complete the vision I have for a picture to be made.
I know I possibly ‘should’ explore, there’s no reason for me not to. But I don’t.
I rarely interact with others in either life. I think perhaps I am a natural, and long standing, recluse.
Not that I don’t care for the few friends that I have, I do, I care very deeply about them.
And hope that each of them knows they will always find a shoulder to cry on, and an ear that can be relied upon to listen.
And the ability to ‘forget’ whenever it is politic to do so.
In the atomic world I worked alone. Occasionally I had a little company – perhaps a trainee, maybe a workman patiently readying where I was about to work. Clients – of course. But they were merely a necessary evil, never company!
Perched on a ladder, squeezed into a corner somewhere, sitting at my work table, washing my brushes at the kitchen sink – I was alone. And happy in my solitude.
I am never lonely, but almost always alone.
But in writing this I have had the sudden realisation that I DO travel! ………. but not to places.
I travel the routes of knowledge. I visit the sites of learning.
And here was I thinking I had been merely pootling through life!
In the last six months I have taught myself to mesh. For sure no Artist – but capable enough, and the possibility is there to be one if I work hard.
And I am about to start learning again. This particular platform could almost have been created with me in mind! Clothing, fashion, textiles, design. Things that have been the very foundation of my life, that have lead to all of the other paths I tread.
I have Second Life to thank for these new and thoroughly enjoyable pursuits.
For without it, and the need to learn how to make the best of the machines I had, I would still be muddling through in that other, messy existence.
Still be drifting through life trailing the scents of turpentine and oils rather than Fragonard.
Still be wondering just how the wood dust and the silver leaf got to be in my bed.
Still finding a pot of sequins where the salt should have been.
And would never have known the utter joy of beautifully manicured nails!
And still ignorant of this brave new world of computing and science that we find ourselves in.
I bestride two worlds …….and their horizons are only limited by my imagination.
I AM an Explorer!
2 thoughts on “Reflections . . . . and a realisation”
Oh, wow! Part of the beauty of writing relies on the fact that, after you publish your text, it’s not all yours anymore. I mean, you cannot really control how people will read it and where it will lead them to (or where they will lead it to). I am really surprised at the reflections that you have developed after reading my blog post. Certainly, it’s food for thought – and great food for thought. Thank you for sharing it with us.
I’d like to comment on a particular sentence by you: “Not that I don’t care for the few friends that I have, I do, I care very deeply about them.” I’m sure you do, I have seen that, myself. Being reclusive or being dedicated to building/creating things does not mean that one does not care for other people. But I’d like to share a personal note concerning that. Once, in SL, I decided to learn and dedicate myself to making clothes. I opened a store and started selling my creations, and I was relatively successful. So, the activity grew and I would spend more and more time creating stuff. I had fun for a while. Nonetheless, at some point, I realized I was missing part of what was important to me in SL: the ability to cultivate bonds with people from distant, different places, to learn from them and with them, to build stuff *with* them and not just for them. That’s when I closed my store and decided that I had to stop.
Still, I wanted to dedicate myself to some project, and that’s how my current blog was born. My project now is to explore SL – not only running up and down its places, but also going out there and meeting its residents, checking some of their creations and allowing myself to share part of my thoughts on what SL means in cultural and social terms.
I don’t mean to be an example or a model to anyone. Nor I mean that what’s important to me should be important to everyone else. And actually, I am thankful that other people still make clothes and put lots of passion in doing it – so I can buy their creations and try to look good, hehehe. But I do mean that, in my case, though I miss creating things – and that’s why I write and take pics – I feel the need to balance it with some time to spend with friends and to explore the different sims out there. 🙂
Thank you for your kindness Ricco. And your generosity of spirit. And for sharing your thoughts so succinctly with us all.
I’m so glad that you have found your balance within Second Life …we are all the richer for that fact 🙂